By Orison Swett Marden
We think our overactive busyness, constant distractions, restlessness, and widespread unease is unique to the time we are in. Unfortunately it's not.
This book was published in 1913 and was designed to help people deal with the ever day problems they faced. In 1910 only 20% of adults couldn’t read or write and only 14% of homes had a bathtub. Now you’d think that their problems were hunger, lack of heat/AC, or something else specific to that time. But rather the book is about problems that feel very real to many of us today, despite our modern comforts.
Chapter titles like “The strain to keep up appearances kills happiness” containing sentences like “Its not so much our lack of comforts or luxury, as our envy, selfishness and false standards that makes us unhappy." is something that wouldn't have stood out published in a book today. This book is very Lindy. And following from that it means that its content is very likely to be applicable in 2113, as crazy as that sounds.
"The habit of looking for the best in our work, and of seeing the best in everybody and everything is of untold value."
"The unhappiness of life lies in the fret of it; not in its work, but in its worry."
There is an entire chapter devoted to work and responsibility and how essential it is to happiness and well being. Remind you of any one who became very famous for spouting something similar? Do any particular Canadian psychology professors come to mind?
One thing from this chapter that seems a little obvious but really stuck with me is the following. We appreciate and enjoy doing our own work. I think most people would agree that humans can be like pack animals in the sense we are happiest and most in our element when we have some load to bear. Now when we view art, read books, or drive a cool car, we are not so much enjoying the art, book, or car, but rather we are enjoying the work and the load people have carried to produce such things. This perhaps seems a little obvious in hindsight but I feel we don’t naturally think this way. When I feel amazed by a nice car, I feel amazed by the car itself, not the collection of people who managed to turn raw iron into a beautiful machine. This seems wrong. And a deliberate correction is probably a good idea.
The cure for a person who is aimless, has low self worth, and is filled with self loathing, is to take on responsibility. To find a load you can bear. Perhaps there is also cure for thinking that our society is fundamentally corrupt, that everyone around you is racist or sexist, that the vast majority of people are trash and need to be whipped and forced into the right direction because they are too stupid to do the right thing on their own. Maybe this cure is to start appreciating the large group people who carried the load to help bring you all the modern luxuries that make your life so wonderful. Maybe realizing that if they helped create all these wonderful things you enjoy, that maybe they aren’t so bad.
If I said “appreciate nature” you’d know exactly what I mean. You could easily conjure up an image of enjoying a sunset or a mountain range. You’ve certainly done this quite often and maybe feel some notion of guilt that you don’t do it more often. However if I said “appreciate man”, do you as easily conjure an image of yourself enjoying the sight of a skyscraper, a passenger plane soaring overhead, or even marveling at the fact that you can pull a fresh tomato out of your refrigerator, despite the fact that it has been below freezing temperatures for consecutive months? If there was specific entity that created our favorite mountain range or adjusted the colors on an amazing sunset, we would feel nothing but awe for this being and express nothing but gratitude. In fact some people gather every Sunday to do just this. Yet where is the awe and gratitude for the people around you who on a daily basis work to make things just as marvelous.
Maybe we are better at this then I give us credit. Plenty of people today are certainly in awe of Picasso, Hemingway, and Ford. However, A ) our modern versions don’t seem to fair so well. Steve jobs, Mark Zuckerberg, Jeff Bezos, and Elon Musk definitely have a large number of fans, but the intensity of the vitriol spewed by their critics seems totally unprecedented. And B) does anyone even pay any mind to anyone but the big names?
Anyways.
The last chapter is about how when you are old, it's hard to find new joys and hobby's. So if you retire without any hobby's you will long for work as that's the only thing you know. You need to learn to enjoy and cultivate a hobby earlier in life so when you retire you have something you can maintain and still enjoy. Once your time comes, you are too set in your ways to enjoy something new.